the Silver Rule
Integrity
Integrity
Upholding your morals, your faith, or your own personal rules in the face of adversity is called "integrity." The basic thought is this: if you claim an action, decision, or word is the right thing to do or say then you should be following your own advice. Those who don't will look like hypocrites for saying one thing and doing another.
But why is this bad? When we call out the faults or wrong doing of others we tend to also put ourselves on a higher moral tier. We look down on people because they are not as good or as saintly as ourselves. Or we have pity on those who cannot live up to our standards. This is just another form of egoism. We separate ourselves from the immoral and stop seeing them as people. We stop seeing the truth: that we are no different ourselves.
To others it might look like we are shifting blame from ourselves for our own faults, to others whose faults are worse; at least in our own eyes. Others might also see the simple truth: we are hypocrites. We don't like it when we feel bad, so we compare ourselves to people who are actually bad to make ourselves feel better. Again, this just hides the truth: we are all the same.
Instead, we should focus on being respectful and kind to all people. People we love, but also people we do not like. Treating everyone with respect shows our maturity and our integrity. It shows others that we will treat them with fairness and love even if we disagree. It will show we are a just person who treats everyone with dignity.
Throughout the Gospels Jesus calls out the hypocrisy of the Jewish leaders of the time. Many of them are pushing new laws or new interpretations of the Jewish Law onto the people. Some are doing it to maintain control. Some are doing it to laud their prestige over the common folk. Needless to say Jesus puts them in their place. But he also directs this call to stay away from hypocrisy directly to the people. "Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?" (Luke 6:41) As the people follow him all over to listen to his teachings he begins to teach them why it's important to love your enemies:
“But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them. Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. Do to others as you would have them do to you.
“If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.
If you love people who love you back, how does that make you special? Your enemies love their children, their parents, maybe even their country. If you truly believe what you say you believe - if you truly believe it is right to respect every human being - then you should respect all human beings. Not simply the ones you like, or agree with, or whom agree with you.
What is there to say on this subject? We can all think of people in our past, or possibly present, who have spoken one way and acted another. Whether it's a politician who promised change but brought corruption. A teacher who held you to the rules, but let her favorite do whatever they wanted. A coach who told you he needs players to play the positions that are best for the team, but lets that one kid play whatever position he wants. A parent who scolds you for breaking rules, but then laughs when a younger sibling does the same. A friend who says they'll always be there for you, but who runs away as soon as things get hard...
History looks upon the cheaters, idolaters, hypocrites, and liars with very little sympathy. We talk about these people using the above adjectives. However, the people who fought for good, helped others, raised people up, and admitted when they were wrong with the intention of getting better in the future? We don't talk about which adjective describes them, we talk about their deeds. We tell stories about their battles. We pass on the lessons we learned from them.